YNTE has a new writer!

I've just added a new writer to the blog, so everyone give a warm YNTE welcome to our newest writer: Ryan Umemoto, aka "Umi".

Honestly, the only reason it took me this long to make him an account is because I basically just assumed he had one all along. I mean, seriously, we've been talking about him, have a tag about him, and have pictures of his purple car up. Even though he hasn't been writing for us, he's been a presence on the blog.

Umi is of course famous for the "Umi Joke", wherein he eiher takes something 3 steps beyond its humorous conclusion, or repeats exactly what you said and expects equal laughs. Or perhaps he will start telling a joke and forget the punchline, asking you midjoke what the punchline to his joke is.

It is your responsibility, dear readers, to make fun of him endlessly in the comments if it ever happens here. I know I will!

I think he means drunk.

Umi: But because of that, my friends took me out and got me shitty.
Evan: I don't think that's a real phrase.

I'm making fun of something someone said and it isn't Tom for once.

This follows a conversation about how nerdy Umi is.

Umi: I had to take my phone off my belt clip. It kept hitting stuff.
Evan: Just put it in your pocket protector, you nerd.
Umi: I WISH I had a pocket protector.

...he wasn't joking.

Not Last!

The ITC Purple Cobras* have risen to the ranks of volleyball medicrity. That's right, tonight we won 2/4 games bringing our overall match record to 2 and 6. Also, according to Umi, our record is now better than the Seahawks' record this past season, which was 4 and 12. So to all of you out there who think you know math and think that they're identically bad, well, you're right and Umi's an idiot, but we still rule.

But most importantly, I scored a couple points, including some awesome spikes! And Steve (aka Steve the Pirate) didn't spike any teachers in the face, and I didn't cheer afterward.

*Not our official name, but we don't really have one.