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Sunday, February 28, 2010

SHOCKING NEWS...

...Far Cry is a bad movie.

Despite being Uwe Boll's most accurate adaptation to date, it still feels incredibly dissimilar to the game I played.

For those of you unfamiliar with the game, it tells the story of Jack Carver, a war vet badass who now runs a charter boat. He is hired by a reporter to take her to a remote island. Immediately after she leaves to go ashore, his boat is blown up (this all happens in the opening cutscene). As he investigates, he discovers a sinister science operation experimenting on humans to create mutant supersoldiers.

Here is the shocking part: That all actually happens in the movie!

However, that doesn't mean the movie is at all similar to the game. There's a half hour of useless exposition before the boat is destroyed. Then there's some decent action scenes. This is the point of the movie I began to have a small nugget of hope.

Unfortunately, the movie takes a left turn here. The two main characters find an abandoned shack, and despite having been pursued by men trying to kill them just moments ago, the decide the safe thing to do would be to strip mostly naked and get in bed together. This of course leads to them having sex, despite the fact that they had done nothing but argue the entire movie up to this point.

Then we get back into some plot/action, as they try to infiltrate the military base to steal a boat and make it off the island. This scene could have been good, but was full of pointless dialogue about whether or not Jack was good in bed. It could have been a bit funny as a throwaway line, but it continued throughout the movie.

Then the movie started to really suck. When Jack finds a boat, it's inhabited by "Emilio", a fat idiot who follows them around the rest of the movie. He has no purpose but "comedy relief". The problem is that Uwe Boll mixed up "funny" and "annoying". The guy continues around the movie making annoying comments that have no purpose but to encite a murderous rage in the audience.

The movie was bad. Really, really, bad. But unlike previous Boll flicks, this one had nuggets of decent filmmaking. The action scenes were pretty good, when nobody was talking; there were even hints of a cohesive story for the plot. But the pointless characters, bad acting, and aimless direction keep it from getting anywhere near the potential I saw.

So in a way, this the worst Boll movie, because it was disappointing. It could have been good, but in the end, it was just the same old terrible slop he normally makes.

Final Score:
D--

So there's on YNTE Movie Night in the bank! Stay tuned for next month's flick!

Did you see it this month? Leave your thoughts below!

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