It's Vegas, Baby!

So I returned home from Vegas yesterday, and subsequently passed out after the irritating flight home. Since my first name is the latest in the alphabet compared to the rest of my family, I get the pleasure of always getting an aisle seat, and I can't just take a nap on the plane 'cause people are constantly running into my arm on account of their tiny bladders. Consequently I didn't end up joining Umi and Evan in their Left 4 Dead game.

In any case, I thought I'd share the luxurious minibar my room came stocked with... wait, there was no mini bar, just this:

I certainly do enjoy my water, but not $7 for that. Hell, for $2 more I could run downstairs and get 3 bottles of Coke for that! But I digress. I was going to share the amazing meals I was going to have, but they were all pretty standard. So instead, enjoy these advertisements heavily laden with innuendo, starting from least to most obscure.

Anyway, this'll be the last post before my last post of the year. Cryptic!

Talk about targeted advertizing!

Regular readers of this blog know that I am a fan of KFC and it's over the top unhealthy food, namely the Double Down - a bacon sandwich that uses Fried Chicken for buns.

But apparently KFC has been having trouble advertizing. Apparently when using traditional advertizing venues such as tv and print ads, too many rational people see it. They really want to target the ads to idiot young males like myself. So KFC hatched a brilliant plan. Instead of advertizing on TV or the internet, they'd advertize somewhere sure to attract idiot males:

Sexy lady butts.
It's like they're saying "You like big asses? I can help you get your very own giant ass!"

Source.

Advertizing Fail

Dear Google: When a somebody makes a webcomic criticizing a product, that might not be the best spot to advertise THAT EXACT PRODUCT.

(screenshot taken from my RSS feed. Original strip here: http://chainsawsuit.com/2010/09/15/tickets-please/)

Pdrepper's Twitter page is full of shameless self advertising and bad grammar

This is kinda sad. I thought I'd give our old friend Pdrepper some attention, so I did a Google search for Dr. Pepper. To my dismay, every single article that popped up omitted the obviously necessary but always-omitted period. To further weaken my resolve, I found the twitter page. It's pretty uninspiring.

Now, if you wanna do an advertising campaign on Twitter or YouTube, you've gotta do it right. The only people I've seen really do this right lately is Old Spice. It's probably the most internet-based ad campaign I've ever seen, and likely the most hilarious. They got Isaiah Mustafa to make 200 YouTube videos in 2 days responding to tweets and other things on the internet. In case you haven't seen them, check it.

Back on topic though, I do have some good news! Doing a Google search for Pdrepper results in YNTE being the top website result. Suck it, internet!

Poetic Justice

You may remember how I got upset at the Kin for improper grammar in their ads.

Well, ha! Now the Kin is gone forever.

Maybe you shouldn't have had such a stupid ad campaign!

Another advertising fail

Maybe I just have a dirty mind, but this ad seems WHOLLY inappropriate for children.

Advertising Fail

Found within an Angel comic book from IDW. The same exact ad is on two consecutive pages.

They must really want us to buy Ghostbusters

Advertizing sucks these days.

What the hell, Microsoft? I realize you didn't use made up words like "funner" or "funnest" or "the most funnerlyierest", but do you not understand how to do a comma-separated list?

Sadly though, this is not the worst advertisement of the day. I heard a radio ad for 7-11 that went something like:

"Do you like TOTALLY AWESOME video games like Mafia Wars or Farmville? No? Well you should like them because they are cool, far cooler than whatever shitty games you like. So shop at 7-11!"

1) Farmville and Mafia Wars suck. Clearly you are not in a position to be chastizing MY taste in video games.
2) What the fuck do they have to do with 7-11?

But assuming 7-11 wants to continue an ad campaign of blatant peer pressure, I've developed a much better ad campaign for them. If any 7-11 ad execs read this blog, FEEL FREE TO USE THIS CAMPAIGN FOR FREE. It's on the house.

"Hi kids? Do you like the TOTALLY AWESOME act of stabbing yourself repeatedly in the eye with a beef jerky stick? No? You are probably a wierd lamer with no friends who probably isn't even cool enough to stab yourself in the eye with salted meat. But if you're a cool kid who doesn't value dorky things like being able to see properly, then be sure to go with the eye stabbing; and where better to get beef jerky to slam in your own face? 7-11."

This ad would be much more topical. You're welcome.